Church

By far the hardest thing about moving to this new Northern frontier for me has been the lack of a church family. Church has always been "easy" for me. I've always moved to new places with a built-in church family that I just had to get to know. Sort of comes part and parcel with being the pastor's daughter I guess. Now I'm not deluded enough to believe that having a church would make all my troubles disappear. Not even a little. More often than not church comes with it's own set of problems...and problem people. But I've always been lucky enough to find a group of genuine people that I could have intelligent conversations with, and was fortunate enough to develop real, and honest, relationships with in every church I've been a part of.

The first issue up here, obviously, is that I didn't move here with my parents. Hahaha. I'm not a ready-made part of any church here yet. The only other time I've moved somewhere without them was when I went to college...so I went to church with all my Bible college friends...not really a huge difference there. Ok, not a problem really. I'm a fairly strong, somewhat outgoing person, I can make friends without mommy and daddy. The second problem is that I was raised in the Church of the Nazarene. There are no Nazarene churches up here. Again, not really a problem, I am by no means blind to the faults of "my" denomination, nor am I hung up on labels. I also like to think that I am not narrow minded, that I am open to thoughts and ideas that I may not have heard before.

I really have very few criteria for a church up here. First, it has to have a children's program. X has been in church all his life and is accustomed to being loved by children, teens, and adults alike. He gets so confused when younger teens don't respond to his smooth pick-up lines at the park. Second, I cannot go to a church that is theologically redonkulous. Using words like this sometimes leads people to believe that I am not intelligent or serious about some things, but I assure you, I am educated and I am listening with a discerning heart. If you are stupid out loud, especially from a pulpit, I will verbally rebel. Third, I need friends. I need church friends. Young, old, married, not married, no kids, 8 kids, I don't care. My husband needs friends, my son NEEDS friends!

These do not seem like unrealistic requests to me. Before coming here I decided that I needed to be careful about choosing a church. I wanted to make sure if I needed to try a couple churches that I would give each church more than one "chance." It would be so easy to find fault in every place and keep "hopping." So I first tried the Alliance church. Since our schools (not MERGED, merged is a bad word) partnered into one, I thought that would be close enough to theology that I was familiar with, so a good place to start. Kids program, check. They are between pastors, so I can't really say anything concrete about the theology as they have had special speakers the 3 times I've been, but so far no red flags. Friends? No one has spoken to me once. I've got all the conversation starters built in, 5 year old kid, burgeoning pregnant belly, sitting alone (M isn't able to come with all the time due to his work schedule), but no. Dropping X off at Sunday school, picking him up, getting coffee from the lobby...no. the only conversation I've had is one lady asked my name and gave me hers then walked away. X loves it. Says his SS teacher is really nice. But I decided I'd given them their "chance" and decided to try somewhere new today.

We tried the Salvation Army church today. I've always been told that the theology between Nazarene and Sally Ann is very close. I've even known/lived with people who grew up Sally Ann, then started going to the Nazarene when THEY moved and found the transition easy and agreeable. Could be that the heavily Newfoundland-flavoured Salvation Army is different. I don't know. But if there is one thing I have completely fallen OUT of love with in the years of my experience, it is emotional manipulation. We were NOT leaving today until SOMEBODY went to the altar! 4 closing songs later she finally called for someone to come pray for her husband. Now really, this might be unfair. The Majors are on vacation, so again this was not the regular speaker, but when I go to a church for the first time and the message is out of revelation, it's about how the world is going to end (i.e. the signs are all around us and apparent, technology is evil and the earthquakes are happening because of technology) and all 7 churches of Asia are covered individually in detail? I get a little antsy. Throw in a couple derrogatory remarks about "the Muslims" and other religions, while saying the Pharisees were idiots, and I'm out the door. I'm afraid the decision was unanimous that this church will not be getting a second visit from us.

There was a good quote though. Almost good enough to be included in "Stuff Old Dude Says." "People are lost and dying while Jesus is knocking at the door to so many hearts. But the knob is not on the outside of the door so that Jesus can just walk in and intrude, he has to be let in, the knob is on the inside." My interpretation? "You're the nob on the inside and you're a nob if you don't let Jesus in." I know, I'm a bad person.

Solution? Not one yet. Best one so far is go to the Alliance church with my mom. X can have the great SS experience and at least my mom will talk to me. (Does that mean I do need my mommy to make friends?) And then find a small group somewhere, or a small church that meets not on Sunday morning, but is more friendly and accepting of discussion and of people like me!!